Hard Rejected Children's Ident - Help Me With Advice


#1

Hello, can someone please give me feedback on this track. Why do you think it doesn’t find place in the Audiojungle market?

Also, if i improve it somehow can i re-submit it again in the future? Or is it done deal with this one?
Thank you for your time :slight_smile:


#2

Hey mate!

Your track has a very nice spirit and instrumentation, but almost everything going on in the third bar sounds odd, atonal and wrong.
In the guitar, are you playing an A7 chord on a C major children song? Too atypical in the context of a kid’s ident, if you ask me. But what makes it even weirder is that the main melody seems to go through C natural precisely over that A7 (which 3rd is C#) resulting in a super tense and disonant interval.

Appart from that it could use some subtle bass line.

I think if you just change that A7 for an Amin7 and add some lows you might be able to re-submit the track.

Sorry if I sounded harsh or anything, not my intention at all. Good luck, pal!
b.


#3

Hello!
Thank you for your time to listen to my track. This really means A LOT to me!
I took my time to review the notes and chords on the song again. And again. Apparently i have some major gaps, or even valleys in music theory. And following that i have some questions.
Yes, i am using a 1 5 6 4 progression(C G A F) in a Kids Ident. The third chord is an A minor chord(A C E). That is the 6th from the C Major diatonic scale. I haven’t used a C# anywhere in the main melody. It uses only the notes C, E, G and A.
If i use an A Major chord ( A C# E) in a C Major scale wouldn’t that be out of scale? I played it again and again and it just sound jazzy(point of jazz, right?Different roots, different scales throughout?).
Sorry for the long comment. It is okay if you do not want to spend time elaborating music theory for me, there are paid tutors for that. If it sounds wrong to you, then it probably is.
Also i am aware that the lows don’t even reach -24 db. My mistake for thinking this will sound “airy” and “light”.
I want to thank you again. Awesome sounding music and logos you got there!


#4

Thanks for the kind words!

You’re totally right, the standard chord progression in a C major context should be C G Am F.
It’s just that to my ears that third guitar chord (A) in the track you shared sounds super major and, as you said, harshly out of scale. Anyway, maybe I’m wrong and I definitely have to get my ears checked! :slight_smile:

Are you completely sure that that A you played is actually minor? I really can hear that defiant C# struggling with the melody, and I feel that if that chord went minor, everything would nicely fit in its right place.

Perhaps another author with a more accurate ear can shoot you a second opinion.

Best of luck!


#5

I confirm, the A heard in the song is major. Make it minor and the whole thing will improve dramatically.

Cheers!


#6

And just on the verge of insanity, I feel I can trust my old rusty ears again! :wink:


#7

My mistake. Thank you all for the feedback. Excuse me for the inconvenience i caused you.


#8

What?!? No inconvenience budy! Glad it helped!