Request for Hard Reject feedback, Corporate style

I’m new at Corporate Advertising style music creation, and used a couple of high sale examples here at AJ as reference tracks. Got the standard hard reject, “not commercial” response. Would really appreciate any feedback on this track since I want to start getting more acceptances here! Thanks.
Link wasn’t working! Thanks Iozovoz!

Hi imbas - the link doesn’t seem to work. Try embedding it again.

Thanks Iozovoz , working now!