With “rhythmically odd” I do not mean off technically or so. It just “feels” odd in a way. E.g. the triplets in the piano somehow work “against the other rhythms”, which musically is absolutely a cool think in my opinion! But I guess that AJ needs a slightly bit “simpler patterns”. At least this is my assumption, of course!
Regarding the “out of tune”, listen carefully at around 45/46 seconds. There is a VERY slight detuned sound, due to the note change probably. It’s not really out of tune in a scale sense, but a very tiny and short “sound”, only. To me it sounds rather natural, but here again: I assume that AJ needs (even in this level of detail) “cleaner” sound. I do not know for sure, though!
Another thing: maybe all the voices are “too polyphonic” with their rhythms or sound, in a way. I cannot describe it more detailed, sorry. Maybe you can relisten the track with this in mind: “how transparent do you can distinguish every single voice, which is playing?”. I am so sorry that I cannot describe it better and again: it’s just a personal assumption and I just want to help.
Good luck though! Keep on trying!