Of course I am open to your criticism.
I don’t have enough experience here to say why it was rejected, but here’s my initial thoughts for how to improve it…
The main thing I noticed is your mix is really mid heavy and really wide. Width is good of course especially in cinematic music… but if you put your track through a correlation meter, it’s in the negatives more than the positives. That means the left and right channels are cancelling out more than they’re summing together. Without going into too much detail, this has some significant negative consequences if you (or your clients) ever have to play it on a mono system, and aside from that it just causes the mix to lack power because the side energy is so much higher than the mid energy (which is where the power usually comes from).
When analyzing width you can also use mid/side frequency analysis with a plugin like Voxengo Span which can sometimes be more helpful than just a correlation meter. If you do so you will be able to visually see that in your track, the side channel is much higher in volume than the mid channel across most of the frequency spectrum. In my experience, most reference tracks will have the two channels much more in balance with one another (many with the mid slightly higher than the side)
The other main issue to my ears is too much energy in the mids. Specifically, the 500 Hz to 1 kHz range during the climax. I think the choir is the main culprit for this, it fits in the mix well in the other sections but at fortissimo volume it just overpowers everything. If it were me I would use some EQ to cut mids and boost highs and lows a little in that section. To me the balance in the rest of the track is alright, it’s just the main climax section that I would change.
With all that said, personally I liked the musical ideas and the arrangement of this track so I don’t think it was rejected for that reason. I would just work on the mix and try to get the balance more in line with other reference tracks, either from here on the site or in trailers/soundtracks that you find.
Thank you very much for detailed information. It was really useful. I will work on your suggestions.
Interesting composition. Adding some brightness with some instruments wouldn’t hurt.
I reviewed your suggestions and it was very helpful. Your determinations are completely correct and I need to work much more on these issues. I was so focused on composition that I missed these details. Thank you so much.
Thank you for your comment. I will consider new orchestration ideas.
I think you need to remove the vocal. It’s a little annoying.
A very interesting piece. Doom and Trouble in the air.
The vocals seem to be one of the central and critical parts of this composition, so I wonder if removing them would ruin the vibe. Maybe making them more subtle, putting back in the mix? Related to the vocals, if someone wanted to do a voice-over, those prominent vocals in the current version would probably interfere with the voice?