Feedback [otsoa]


#1

Hi !
I uploded my first track the last month and He was rejected, now I am not sure what I can do for they accepted my new tracks. So I need your advice for my new track, I am not sur if the mix is good enough.
https://soundcloud.com/otsoa/demin-en-simajeur

Thx, sorry for my poor english.


#2

Hey there!
I don’t think there’s a problem with the mix. Maybe the lead synth arriving at 1:28 is a bit too piercing and dry, stands out more than it should but that’s the smaller thing.
The main problem I think is with the arrangement.
Try a shorter breakdown. There’s too much time flashing around while nothing really happens.
And the other thing I’ve noticed is that the track has no climax at all. After 1:10 (where the peak of the song should start to rage with energy), we are not getting anywhere at all, seems like the flow is stuck. You need to get to the dramatic peak faster and with a lot of energy right after the breakdown. 15 seconds is fairly enough for the breakdown. Manage to get the action from 0:55 to 1:26 to be done in 0:55 to 1:10, and then blow it up, set it to fire with gasoline! :wink: You’ll have to leave some elements out of course, but you can work it out.
Good Luck, Cheers!


#3

Agree with the comment above. It doesn’t seem to have much direction. It needs more energy, drama and climaxes. Also, in the middle I found it hard to hear/feel the rhythm as the synth and percussion parts seemed to be kind of fighting each other. Last but not least, I’m not really sure what it’s supposed to be…what are you going for here? I would try to be clearer in your arrangement and structure.


#4

Ok, thx for your advices. Maybe I make the same “mistak” with two other track with no real climax !? The last track is the only track I have uploded and it is hard rejected. I need to review my plans :).
https://soundcloud.com/otsoa/piano-emotional-licencing
https://soundcloud.com/otsoa/joyful-licensing


#5

Well yes, in Piano Emotional it seems like you are going around the same block for three times without getting anywhere.
As for Joyful, I think throw out the middle part, work out a slightly bigger flow and an ending for the second part, rename it to “Happy Kids” or something, upload it to the “Kids” category and it’s a seller. :smiley:
This is just my honest opinion though, I might be wrong.
CHeers!


#6

Ok, thank you very much for your feedback